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Teasing Frame

A flirting frame is a way to flirt with a girl by portraying what a girl has said or done to mean something different than what she intended.  When the meaning you portray conflicts with the way she views herself and the way she wants others to view her, the difference in that portrayal (and the way both of you interact as a result) can cause both people to become more attracted to one another.

The first example of a flirting frame that I want to go through is a Teasing Frame.  When I think about teasing I think about the way an older brother would tease his younger sister.  Older brothers commonly tease their little sisters for being slower than them, not as good as them, dumber than them, etc.  so if you tease about any of these things then you’re on the right track.

A trick I like to use in my teasing frames for some extra pizzaz is to add a social component to my teasing.  One way to do that is to tease the girl for being low-value compared to me.  For instance, I might frame a girl’s words or actions like they mean that she’s from the crappy part of town, and that would cause her to first probably object to that.

When someone objects to something you say and they defend themselves, they’re hoping that your opinion of them has been remedied and they’ve opposed your framing enough that you won’t do it again.  For this reason, when you later frame another of the girls statements or actions as supporting the idea that the girl is low-value, now you’re doing something that she knows that you know is untrue.  Because the girl knows that she basically told you not to do that and because she knows that you know that what you’re framing her as is untrue, the girl knows that you’re doing your framing specifically to mess with her and to tease her.

Your audacity, your social courage, and your creativity in framing are what’s attractive when you tease a girl, and when you tease successfully you’re always hoping for a reaction where the girl punches your arm and calls you an asshole.

Getting called an asshole and getting punched on the arm for something you say is the sweet spot. 

So do not give up right away!  Again, the first time you tease the girl will object and after that she’ll feel teased and continue to object, but when you’re getting this right she’s going to like what you’re doing and you’ll be able to see that, so keep going.

The one time I would stop teasing a girl would be if I feel like I’ve done too many instances of the same flirting frame in a short period of time and now it’s getting to be just too much.  If people actually verbally say that it’s too far, you should consider stopping for that day.  Additionally, if the flirting is just between you and the girl and other people aren’t around, you should stop when the girl really has had enough and seriously tells you that you should drop it.

Other than all of that, keep going!   Ideally you and the girl are teasing each other a lot, both of you are unaffected, and both of you continue this back-and-forth banter.  This vibe should be attracting both of you to each other!

When you get good at this, you’ll even find yourself looking and searching for a girl who has great banter with you.

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