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Starting a conversation with a girl who is sitting down can be difficult, and it’s going to take some practice to get all of the positioning down pat.  After all, there are tons of things to sit on:  single chairs, benches, U-shaped booths, the ground, etc.  In general when I want to talk to a woman who is sitting down, I do whatever is necessary to get close to her and start talking, then I try to mirror her positioning as best as I can.

The most simple way to start the conversation is when you can simply walk up and sit down next to a girl.  Sometimes I like to bump my butt against hers a bit and if necessary ask her “Mind if I sit a sec?”  This’ll ease her mind a bit if she’s worried about how long you plan on sitting next to her.  Plus it’s common courtesy.

If you’re a bold guy and there’s no seat in sight except the one that she’s on, then you can offer her your hand, raise her up, sit in her seat, and then sit her on your lap.   About a decade or more ago when I took my first dating workshop, I successfully did this move on one of the very first girls I ever approached, and I was surprised as hell when she simply took my lead and sat right on my lap.  I couldn’t believe it worked, and accomplishing that “move” make me feel like I had been given the keys to the planet!  “You mean it’s that easy?!?” I thought.  So give this one a shot because it’s easier than you think.

Other seated positions can get more complicated.  You can find yourself in a position where you’re towering over a girl, and if you’re forced to be in that position to start the conversation, try and look for a way to mirror her positioning and crouch yourself down to her level as quickly as possible.  I’ll often crouch down like a catcher in a baseball game does to talk, then after talking a bit I’ll invite her to stand up for a second with me “because I need to stretch my legs,” or I’ll say something like “Okay my legs are over mind if I sit a sec?”  These are great ways to progress your engagement with the girl into something more solid and less fleeting.  I find that after I’m seated with a group or a woman has stood up to chat with me when all others are seated, I’ve become an accepted member of the group and I’m no longer looked at by the group as someone who should leave because they’re an outsider.

Summing this all up, when you’re approaching a woman who is seated, it’s important to get to her level as soon as possible, then implement yourself with a solid positioning thereafter.  If you open the conversation standing, then after a few seconds crouch to continue, then look to take a seat next to her.  Once you have the same positioning as her, you’re a part of the group.

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