Direct opening is basically starting a conversation by just outright letting the girl know that you like her or that you’re interested in her. The somewhat common or general form of a direct opener is something to the effect of “Hey I just wanted to come up and say hi because I thought you were beautiful” or something along those lines. Other “dating instructors” also talk about the idea of going “direct” to mean that you’re basically directly letting a girl know that you have a sexual interest in her at some point during your conversation.
Many of you may have seen a YouTube video where I discuss direct openers and to be quite honest i’m not a fan of them…at all. Quite simply, I have seen so many students have such poor results with this style of opening that I condemn it’s use. Worst yet, students often get misleading responses from women like a bright smile. The student often thinks he’s getting a great reaction from a woman when in reality she’s just soaking up validation from an over-exaggerated compliment. I smile when girls tell me I’m hot too, and it doesn’t mean I want to have sex with them.
So can direct game work? Yes. And so can “poop” game where all I talk about is poop for 20 minutes then I get a date. The lesson here is that just because you can do it doesn’t mean that doing it all of the time is going to produce the best results for you.
I have a “rule” of attracting women that I go by, and that rule is:
The first step to attracting a woman is that she has to not know if she could get you or not.
So if you directly tell a woman that you like her right away, then it’s often way too soon and it keeps her from getting interested in you simply because she hasn’t had time to decide if she even likes you or not yet. The reality is that women often take far more time than men to get attracted to someone.
I don’t have a problem with letting a girl know that i’m interested in taking her out when it’s the right timing to give her that information. After all, women do have a good idea about your intent when they talk to them and they “know” that you might be interested in them when you start talking and eventually ask for their phone number.
My argument it that letting the cat out the bag (letting her know you like her early on) doesn’t help you. In fact, it hurts your chances with her significantly. If you do plan on using a direct element in your game, the right time to let a girl in on your intentions is AFTER you know she likes you AND after you have also decided that you like her. Letting a girl know you like her right away is bad game in my opinion.
There is one type of guy who direct game works better for, and that type of guy is a guy who is overqualified for the girl he’s talking to. If you’re a very good looking guy (you’ll know if you are) then giving a compliment can serve to raise the woman’s value and lower yours. This is great for when your value is so high above the woman’s that you need to bring your value down.
All of this said, if you’re a guy who still wants to try going direct, I say go for it! Really, I do. I tell all my students that, and if you’re a guy who makes this work repeatedly then that’s great. It’s also great if you’re a guy who just wants to go out and start getting some positive reactions and smiles from women.