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Choose What YOU Want To Do

The emphasis here is on YOU, as in don’t worry about what she wants to do… like at all.

When I was like 21 years old, there was a point in time where I did actually get a date. I was super stoked about it and I really didn’t wanna mess it up, so when I talked with the girl on the phone to ask her out (there was no texting yet at that time) I remember the girl asking me what I wanted to do.  I responded by saying “Well, what do YOU wanna do?!?”  And as you can guess, she said “I don’t know, what do you wanna do?”

I had no clue.

What I learned later is that women are just much more comfortable with the man taking the lead on the first date, so it’s important for you to just choose the activity that you feel like doing for your date that night.  When you do this, there’s about an 80% chance that if you just say something like “I’ve been wanting to do _______ lately” or “I really feel like going to _______ place” that the woman will just say “Okay, that sounds great!”

If a woman happens to not want to go the place you suggest for whatever reason, she’ll often just tell you the reason why and you can adjust accordingly.  It won’t be a big deal at all.  You might be like “I really feel like grabbing some sushi tonight, how about we hit this spot by my place?” and she says “Well I really don’t like sushi, can we do another place?”  Then you just pick another place… easy.

Again, the goal here is to avoid indecisiveness, so pick what YOU want to do and suggest that.  This also means that every date you go on will be something that you actually want to do, and if for whatever reason she can’t go, you can still go and do that thing on your own without her.

From a strategy perspective, suggesting an activity that you want to do allows you also to “no big deal” the date.  For instance, let’s say you’re into art and you’ve been meaning to checkout a Picasso museum.  When you ask the girl out, now you can act like you’re going to do that thing you want to do anyways and you’re just inviting her along if she’d like to go.  All you have to do is say something like “I was planning on going to the Picasso museum this week.  Wanna join me?”  This is a great way to show that you’re an independent guy with his own taste in activities, rather than a guy who is placing a lot of value on going out on a date with her.

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