Written by 12:46 pm Views: 1


The first goal of starting a conversation with a woman is to get her attention.  This may seem obvious, but you’ll be surprised at the length you have to go to get a woman’s attention who doesn’t know you.  After all, you’re a random unfamiliar looking dude whose voice she doesn’t recognize, so sometimes you’ll have to do more to get a woman’s attention than just start talking to her.

In general, there are three ways you can get a woman’s attention: by touching her, by talking to her, and by making eye contact with her.  Sometimes one of these three will be enough for you, and other times you’ll need all three ways to get the job done.

So what do you do if you can only use one way to get her attention and it doesn’t work?

Good question.  The answer is to escalate your effort until you get her attention.

Let’s say I start talking to a girl and she just seems to look straight past me.  It’s possible that maybe she heard me but just doesn’t think that I’m talking to her because we don’t know each other or she doesn’t recognize my voice, so if this is the case I might try to escalate my effort by raising the volume of my voice or maybe pointing directly at her to let her know I’m talking to her.  If that didn’t work then I could escalate further by stepping in front of her, perhaps.

Make sense?

I just keep going and continue escalating my efforts until she gives me her attention.

There is one exception to this rule.   Let’s say that you’re trying to get a woman’s attention and you’ve put in enough effort to get her attention that you know for sure that she’s aware of your presence.  In fact, you’re starting to realize that she must be purposefully ignoring you.  When this is the case (and it’s rare), I usually like to just cut my losses and move on, because the reality is that she probably just doesn’t want to talk to me, and my time is better spent on talking to another woman.

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