Written by 9:05 pm TECHNIQUES Views: 1

Guys are hitting on me

I think every girl in the whole entire world tells stories about how men want them.  They tell them to guys before a relationship, during a relationship, and i’m not sure what they say after cause once i’ve dumped them I don’t exactly call to catch up.  Regardless of when they do it, the story’s always the same.   It’s goes something like “I was at X place with X friend and all these guys were hitting on us” or “I was in X place and there was this guy who was hitting on me.”  Just what exactly does this odd woman-speak mean and how should I react when I hear a story like this from a woman?

The first time I heard a girl tell me “Yeah I was at this place and this guy was hitting on me,” boy did I feel threatened.  The problem was that I was in an emotionally and sexually needy place and I didn’t have abundance with women yet, so I made decisions using a fear as my motivation.  The result was that I made decisions and took action with the goal of not losing a girl rather than making those same decisions knowing that I had the capability to have as many women in my life and as much sex as I would like to.  Maybe then my gut reaction to a story like this would have been totally different.  I wish it would have been as easy for me to just start this mentality as it was to read about it, but the reality was that I wouldn’t start to change this way of operating in my life until I first became aware of it then took action to show myself some abundance.  Instead, for a long time when faced with a conversational topic like this from a woman I would immediately feel a range of emotions from jealousy to insecurity and everything in-between.

The goal of the girl I was talking with, and women in general, isn’t to make a guy feel threatened.  She’s really just trying to displaying her social status and possibly incite a bit of jealousy to get you more attracted to her.  After all, she likes a man more when lots of other women like him, so why wouldn’t it work the other way around?  She’s essentially saying “look how desirable I am, you should desire me too.”   Get it?

The funny thing to me about this is that this is a pretty hollow contention on her part for a couple of reasons.  First of all, it could be total made up bullshit altogether.  Even if we give her the benefit of the doubt and try to believe her, the dudes she’s talking about who like her so much in her story are obviously orbiter/low value dudes, so how much would I be jealous of that?  How do we know they’re low-value?  Well if the dudes were higher value she sure as shit wouldn’t have been telling you about them, she’d be dating them or having sex with them instead of you.  Would you even hear a story like this if that were the case?  No.  That means that when you hear a story like this you can pretty much assume that the girl’s not having sex with other guys, not the opposite!

The problem is that when we hear this type of thing from a woman we don’t picture a low-value schlub hitting on her, we picture our mind’s version of a high-value dude instead.  This is where we can easily fall into the trap of showing insecurity.  Obviously when this happens it’s not a good thing, but on the other hand if you do things right and you show security in your relationship, that’s a form of validation for the girl that you like her.  Make sense?  Insecurity = Get rid of this dude, and Security = She gets to feel validated.  Either way the girl wins, and now that you can see this you can understand why girls say these types of things to their men.  Pretty interesting stuff if you ask me.

The best part about this whole thing is that the solution is pretty easy.  Start listening to girls say these types of stories and try to isolate a pattern in them.  It won’t be tough, and once you get your pattern, try mirroring what the girl says with your own story about a girl hitting on you.  Just use her own pattern for your story.  I might say something like “That’s crazy!  Okay now I don’t feel so bad.  I was at Whole Foods today and it seems like every time i’m in the hot prepared foods place some girl’s asking me about how something is that i’m choosing, blah blah blah.”  The next step here is to put yourself on common ground with the girl by using the fact that you both get hit on as a commonality.  I’d say “I guess we’re both super hot people who just get hit on all the time.  Everyone wants to do us.”

And finally, the game part.  I still wanna maintain attraction with my girl by dominating this whole exchange, so the way i’ll do it is to frame the guys that hit on her as losers and the girls that hit on me as super hot.  So i’ll say something like “You know what though?  I bet the girls that hit on me are totally hotter than the retards that hit on you.  Like if you put them both in the room, my girls would totally deny all the dudes hitting on you.  They would be like “Uhh, gross… I would never”  (insert girl impression with disgusting face, voice, attitude, etc). ”  This’ll be a fun way to do some bantering and jousting that you can come out on top of.

That’s about it.  Girls are telling guys stories all the time about how they get hit on incessantly.  The girls do get hit on, but it’s by low-value type dudes and somehow we as men still find a way to get insecure about the whole thing instead of just realizing that the whole thing’s happening cause the girl likes us.  So don’t be a retard!  Realize what’s happening, be a step ahead, and maybe next time she’ll think twice about telling you a lame story.  And even if she does, it’s just because she likes you.

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