Girls tell guys that they’re lesbians all the time to get rid of them. No doubt this practice has been alive since the dawn of time and will continue to the end of it. In fact, present day statisticians report that girls tell guys that they are lesbians an average of eleventy billion times each night. Wow that’s a lot! But enough science here, why do girls say this to guys, what can we say when it happens to us, and most importantly what can we do to prevent it completely?
I’m going to try and keep this short and sweet today, so listen up. Girls say they’re lesbians to guys when three things have happened:
1. The girl believes you’re hitting on her
2. The girl doesn’t think she wants to have sex you
3. The girl believes that you’ll go away if she says she’s a lesbian
Feel free to absorb that a couple more times or go through it again after reading the rest of this post, cause it’s deceptively simple.
Okay, now that you’ve got it let’s talk about things a bit more in-depth. The first thing that needs to happen for the lesbian comment to happen is that the girl has to know you’re hitting on her. What’s important here isn’tif the girl thinks you’re hitting on her, it’s how she gets the idea that you’re hitting on her andwhen she gets it. For a girl to be really into a guy she has to feel like his value is at or above hers, and this happens best when she likes him before she can figure out if he likes her. Telegraph your interest too soon to a woman and she’ll believe your value is lower than yours, wait to telegraph and you don’t have to decide yet what you’d like to do or have with her. It’s a position of power. The girl won’t know your intentions until you choose to let them be known (if at all).
Does it really happen that the girl likes the guy before he likes her? No, dumbshit! Obviously most guys will have sex with a girl without much thought at all. Here’s the catch. Girls aren’t thinking about just having sex, they’re thinking about relationship potential. If when I approach, I do the same and think about relationship potential with a girl instead of just sex, I will naturally tend to hold back a bit more and as a result not telegraph too much interest.
I know from experience that sometime down road any girl who i’m seeing is going to push for a relationship, it’s inevitable. And if I have sex with a girl who desperately wants a relationship with me while knowing all the while that I don’t want one with her, i’ll create some pain in her life unnecessarily. Not cool. Sex isn’t fun when you’re fucking someone over, and when you’ve fucked someone over you are deserving of any consequences you might experience. This is why I recommend being a little more up-front about your intentions. In other words, maybe in the beginning you’re open to the possibility of eventually having a relationship until you figure out however long into things that it’s no longer going to be an option with that girl. If having sex with her is still something you’d like to do anyway, then it might be time to be a little forthcoming with that information. After all maybe she’ll be cool with that type of a thing and you can both have sex on the regular without strings and drama. People do it, and the best part is you didn’t “lie” or act in a dishonest way.
What’s far more common in meeting a woman is the scenario where the guy telegraphs his intentions far too soon to the woman and now he’s left to fight an uphill battle. You can still win the game when playing this way, it just becomes more about not exhausting your margin for error at that point because the girl’s now the one deciding if she likes you instead of the reverse. How much margin for error do you have, you ask? Well when any guy talks to a girl, she will assess his value very quickly upon talking with him and allow him an according amount of leeway to try and have sex with her before she calls things off. Often this has quite a bit to do with her first impression of you, so if you’re hot, well-dressed, or have great presence you can be more of an idiot before getting the boot. No matter how good looking you are though, exhaust your margin by even a small amount and you might be seeing the lesbian objection. And as we all know, when the lesbian objection shows up the game is most likely going to be over with that girl.
Sooooo…. how to we approach and how do we not telegraph interest? The rule is this: Your approach itself (the simple act of walking up and starting a conversation) should be the only thing that telegraphs any interest to the girl. When you approach a girl, your approach alone isn’t enough to telegraph your interest to her. She needs other clues. Learn how to withold them and you’ll have great results with women.
The second thing that has to happen to get the lesbian objection is that the girl doesn’t think she wants to have sex with you. When i’m training guys in the field, a common reason I see that the girl shuts down the guy’s approach is the value disparity that’s caused by the premature telegraphing of interest that i’ve discussed above. The other reason girls won’t talk to a guy very long is because his pre-approach and initial-approach game isn’t solid. This is stuff like poor presence, body language, eye contact, poor style, etc. Remember, there is a way to approach without blowing your cover that you’re into the girl you’re talking to. Find that way. And if that telegraphing doesn’t happen prematurely in your game, then it’s time to start looking into other areas for solutions to why the girl doesn’t want to have sex with you. As you can imagine, it can be very tough to figure out this information.
The last reason a girl will tell you she’s a lesbian is because she believes it’ll work. Now this is partly not your fault because obviously this excuse works on chumpy idiots all day long, but the reality is that while you may very well appear like you’re one those dudes, you’re not really one of them until you believe the girl and walk away with your tail in-between your legs. That doesn’t mean that since you know what she’s doing you can just tell her something like “Oh you’re just saying that because you want me to go away” though. That’ll only result in you looking worse.
The better choice here is to understand this lesbian objection and take it as a sign that you’ve telegraphed interest prematurely and should do stuff for a couple minutes to communicate the opposite. Often when faced with this, i’ll “no big deal” it with my actions and verbally say something like “Oh cool” and just continue talking about what I was talking about, but strip the “gamey” portions of it out until I can continue onto some other material or natural stuff that’s less gamey. For instance if i’m in the middle of Smart/Hot/Rich routine and I say “I like girls who are smart, cause then I get bored” and she pops up with a lesbian objection, i’ll might change “I also like girls who are hot and girls who are rich” into “Oh cool, you ever date someone who’s super dumb? Like, do you think she’s ever dumb?” After that we might talk down that conversational thread a couple minutes and establish a bit of rapport instead of banging through attraction stuff. I can always add more flirting frames, attraction routines, role-plays, and kino later on once the i’ve established value and their guard is down further.
So there you have it, the lesbian objection. Girls tell you they’re lesbians because your game sucks. You telegraph interest prematurely and they perceive their value as higher than yours for whatever reason, they want you to go away, and bam! Girls magically turn into lesbians and start scissoring each other out on the spot, chopping their tits off, taking testosterone pills, and getting butch haircuts so the wind cools their head while they drive their semi’s down the freeway. “Breaker, Breaker 1-9, we got a got a huge Bull-Dyke on our hands!” All the while you’re left to feel retarded and chumpy, ouch! The good news is that if you understand how not to do all the bad shit and how to adjust in the meantime, you’ll be sleeping with those wanna-be lesbians in no time. Thanks for reading!